Live to learn. Learn to live.

This quote was introduced to me by my high school dance coach, and I think it is SO true. I've been thinking about goals a lot lately, and what drives them. My greatest goal has always been to become a doctor. I have wanted to go to medical school essentially all of my life - since my grandma Judy planted the seed in my young mind that this would be a good career choice for me.  I have to admit, I went in and out of wanting it as my confidence in myself went in and out. But once I was convinced that I was smart enough, there was pretty much nothing that could stop me. When I ask myself why I truly want it, my grandma is the first thing that comes to mind. I don't often tell people this, because it invites the advice that you should never do something for someone else. Do it for you - it should be your dream. But it is my dream. It's my dream that my grandma, who meant SO much to me, and I shared - and I want to make her proud. I like to think that my grandma knew me...

I'm going to try to piece together the events of the past week because naturally, I think they're interconnected leading me to my newest realization. Stay with me if you can... Monday: I'm at my CrossFit box doing the morning daycare, playing with Reagan, and this beautiful human pops his beautiful head through the door and waves. I don't think much of it. There are lots of beautiful humans at CrossFit gyms. I am getting ready to lift and the beautiful human is chatting it up with another gym member so I eavesdrop. He's on a road trip coming from Seattle. This gets me excited so I pipe in, "What part of Seattle? I was born there and have family there!" We exchange a few sentences and then we all go to our respective lifting platforms. About halfway through lifting I decide it's necessary I give this stranger my phone number. He's passing through, leaving before I am (for medical school in the fall), and the worst that can happen is either a...

I am trying this as a suggestion of a dear friend. I journal a lot - and every once in while I share it with people when it's something I want them to know, or when I think  something I'm going through might relate to their life as well. This friend in particular suggested other people might connect to what I have to say. Most of my journaling is done when I'm having a hard time or when I'm elated. I've never considered myself much of a writer, but if something I write resonates with someone else then it is worth sharing. So, here we go.  I've been kind of angry lately. My mom has told me since I can remember, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" (I'm pretty sure it's a line from Bambie). It is, I found the video. So, that is what I have stuck to. The times I have strayed from it, I have regretted it a great deal. Sometimes it's appropriate and necessary to communicate when you feel you have ...